Ryoga's Journal
by SotF
Summary: A 1st person attempt for explaining Ryoga in a different way where he isn't exactly as he appears to be.


People hate me, others fear me, and yet it is not the real me that they know.

The first thing you should know about my family is that we possess a pair of gifts that could also be curses.

The first is an ability to littlerally go anywhere in the blink of an eye, a useful talent, but if we don't pay enough attention to what we're doing, well, finding our way places is rather hard.

The second is that we have been given the gift of seeing the future, and in my case, well, it is the most powerful that anyone in my family has seen before, but that comes at a price in that I have no real control over what I see and that messes up my ability to use the first gift.

That's right, I end up getting a vision of some sort and end up somewhere way out in the middle of nowhere without really trying.

But back to the gifts, my family has kept them hidden for centuries, and well, you probably have an idea as to why we keep them hidden. If you don't, imagine what Nabiki would do if she knew about it and add in the lotto...

But now that the first part is explained, now to explain the rest of the facade I wear.

When I was young, I started recieving visions about someone who would face a monster and save the world. Now I didn't know who this person was, only that I would meet him and my eventual actions would help decide the outcome of that eventual battle.

Another thing to consider is that I had trouble getting along with others, the martial arts training and other activities I understood often put me at odds with the other students at the school I went to, and several people hated me for being better than they were at it. And my abilities even screwed up what chances I had of even being at school regularly.

When I saw Ranma, I saqw the strongest possibilities I had ever seen, here this boy my own age was the one who had the potential to be as good as the flaming monster of my visions, but on the other hand, I could have had my first friend, someone who could possibly understand me, but if I was his friend, then he would never be strong enough to face the monster and save the world.

Some choice, huh, a life of pretty much loneliness or the world.

So I started to challenge him and the guy, while brilliant at the Art, was a thick headed moron when it came to everything else. And then I followed him, trying to find ways to assure that he would get stronger.

And that was when my life got even worse, the cursed springs of Jusenkyo screwed my life over to an entirely new level. And yeah, before you ask, it really wasn't Ranma's fault, though the damned visions about him did keep my attention away from what happened around me. And well, the next thing I knew I was a pig and almost got eaten.

But anyway, when I followed the trail of the kid, I found the Amazons, or rather, they found me. It is a fortunate thing that they knew about my family, or at least some of it and that was enough to keep me out of their schemes, but it did give me the opportunity to send a few of them after Ranma in the hopes that they would provide some challenge for him.

And well, after that I started having trouble, basically, when I was in the form of a Pig, all of my visions wouldn't happen, but they'd all happen as soon as I became a human again, and that got rather annoying. I started having trouble making them stop long enough to get some decent sleep, and they started showing me every point where I could influence the change, or nexus, though not in order, and they kept on showing me the worst possible outcomes.

And then to top it off, my parents ended up dead in, of all things, a car wreck.

And to top even that one off, Ranma got an "Interesting Times" curse put on him that started heaping even more Nexus' into his path.

And then things went even farther down hill after I found Ranma again, well, the one girl decided to keep my pig form as a pet which made my life even more miserable when the Nexus' I was seeing started messing with my every human moment and I was a tad bit outside of the box most people view as sane...

And after I made my first move there, things kept on snowballing for me, I've hated myself and whoever was responsible for this ability for a long time and lashed out at nearly everyone, but I kept my violent outbursts focused on those who could take them, and they would force Ranma to get stronger.

And once I got ahold of the Shishi Hokoudan, I at least had an outlet for most of my anger and depression as everything spiraled out of control. And things kept on comming aster and faster and I often prayed I had made or forced the right choices on people to keep the world from being destroyed by a lunatic firebird.

And then when it finally happened, I was unaccustomed to not having the visions plaguing me that I kept on doing what I had been doing, and worked to at least give the guy a break as well and the keg of water would have been a nice bonus in the end. But the little troll caused even more problems then, and well, I felt almost lost at the time and as such have decided to vanish, let them forget me and hopefully for the better as for once in my life I see a bright future.

**xXx**

**AN:** I was reading through my Ranma 1/2 manga and well, normally I hate Ryoga. I also found an old paper I had to write in high school that was where we had to choose a character we hated and had to think of a way to make them understandable if not actually one that could be liked. And this idea hit me, there is no way in hell I'm writing more of this and if someone wants to try to expand it, you're quite welcome to do so.


End file.
